Life in the End Times

Shin's gift to Annie on their One Year Anniversary

River Released Dream May 5 2012

Filed under: Dreams & Nightmares — Annie at 7:19 am on Sunday, May 5, 2013

Dreamed we were all going to Raymond and Grace’s place and were going to help them paint a bathroom olive green. We are driving through the neighborhood and see people in one home through the window setting up leg less chairs on the floor= we realize they are preparing for church at home. When we arrive the whole church is there. Some people watching Les Mis, etc etc. There are some olympic games going on. Supposedly one of those games/players is outside just a few blocks away. A lot of us start walking and have to climb this blue staircase down. The steps are so far apart you have to jump from step to step, but there are walls, and support underneath. At the bottom of the blue staircase there’s a girl making a dress with the same pattern I used. I tell her I’ve made that dress, etc. We exchange names and shake hands. She isn’t part of the church she is selling earrings at the entrance. To our right we see where the park goes down more where the athletic events are taking place. At the park there are lots of swing sets. We are sitting in the sand looking up when we see a guy climb to the top of the swing sets. Must be 60ft high or so. He has protective gear but he jumps. I think I’m going to faint with shock but he’s fine.

All of a sudden we see/hear water rushing from behind the playground- a higher level flowing down and it fills up and starts flowing into a river channel. Everyone has known this water would be released but no one knew when. At first the water in the channel is muddy but when we get to the edge of the water it is Hawaii blue and clear. But the current is strong and dangerous to go in or fall in. We have to cross this to get back to Raymond and Grace’s house. Shin is there and I look at the channel and see a small brick + wood path. I say we can cross there! But then realize that its a whole floating section of a path that is slowly inching by. So Shin grabs my hand and we are the first to cross over. People are still heading up and out of the park. A few people behind us also make it but we are telling people to cross over on the next available floating sections because there’s a sense that there won’t be as many easy opportunities to cross afterward as the water levels may rise more. I feel uncertain about the what the situation would be for others still on that side but I see a line of white vans lining up on the playground side, perhaps to help. I also see a woman far away walking with a polio limp-I wonder how she will be able to quickly cross over- but she hits the wall and is frustrated. We are also looking for Soojin and desperate for her to cross over but she isn’t in sight.

End of dream

Mission and Other Dreams

Filed under: Dreams & Nightmares — Annie at 9:15 am on Thursday, April 25, 2013

Dreamed that I was in South America and I was in a field. The right half of the field had been cultivated but on the left side the ground had not been broken. A farmer on a tractor watched me quizzically as I created two planting rows. I felt out of place. I created two rows and covered it with plastic to heat up the soil and protect from marauding birds. But realized I had not planted any seeds in them. I opened my bag and in the place of seeds were an assortment of sewing notions, needles, buttons, etc.

Dreamed that Aunt Sarah asked us to come and assist in an English speaking country

Dreamed that I was at some church conference. Some people in the church began attacking me. They were powerful. The message of the dream was that the presence of 2 or 3 witches in a church can bring it down.

Dreamed that I was at a quilting factory run by a famous Korean quilter and her daughter. There was a gray haired male speaker, who was sort of the fundraiser chair, who presented the story of the quilter and her background as a persecuted Christian. In the story she was fleeing with a box strapped to her back and very ill and tired. She met a fisherman who was willing to risk his life to protect her and accept her in her state. They decided to marry and I saw a vivid quiet scene where her hand was in a clear stream of water with pebbles beneath and she is looking at the top of her hand through the water. She is wearing a simple wedding band like mine and suddenly it looked like/was my hand! And then his hand was also in the water. It was beautiful and I felt a wave of emotion. I was touched by the love, their courage, and the hardships. So the presentation ended and we are walking to another part of the building and I see this old painted advertisement that states the power of color to control people. We go outside and there are bunch of korean junior high kids in line being typical church kids. I show the daughter a WIP- a silk quilt that I started for my mom that was 80% done. But when I open it out all my quilting is somehow gone. I feel relief that I can start over. I look around at their inventory of cotton, silk, and polyester finished quilts

Filed under: Mommy — Annie at 1:23 pm on Tuesday, December 4, 2012

My kids turned 4 and 2 this weekend and… I’m grieving. Strange I should feel sad when they are still present… but there is a loss of something as they get older- they lose characteristics of their former selves and go on to become other beings. They even forget memories, traits and habits they used to have. Its all going so quickly… my precious babies.

This weekend in a bout of frustration over other things, I finally snapped and decided to cut Josie’s hair. I was suppressing the impulse b/c Shin wanted to wait until she was two. I had wanted to wait and take her to a salon for her first cut so that she’d have a cute big girl cut. Instead I made a wreck of her bangs. And while she ate ice cream and I stared at her hair intent on fixing it. But while I was cleaning up she took a scissor to her own hair and snipped right at the roots. There was hair on the floor and in her ice cream bowl!!! I gasped and took the scissors away but the damage was done…

She still looked cute as ever is the funny thing. She is two… this is just an insignificant first of many shinanigans… It was a bittersweet incident.

I’ve been a bit depressed lately… I think its just going so fast… and I can’t keep up with any of it. Keeping the house in order, thinning out things they don’t need, or clothes. Keeping the dishwasher empty and the sink clean, food ready. And then on top of that I sew for my sanity and I sew for the pure love of sewing and creating. Most days I put my hobbies on hold till the end of the day when I think that will be my time for me… and it doesn’t come. Because they need me until the last moment when they sleep and then even at that Josie wakes up always with the cry, “Eat? Eat?” at 11pm, 2am, 3am, and then playing until 4 and 5 in the morning before I finally rock her to sleep. And yet right now is the season to consider a third child? I would love, like the Duggars to keep enjoying this baby stage, 13, 14, 15 times over but the years beyond that are so overwhelming… my Elijah is 4. He is so observant and intelligent. Sometimes his comments are so insightful they arrest me. How he differentiates things in his logic. And how for the most part he is not verbal though he understands. But when he wants something so adamantly he repeats it over and over and over and over and over and over……………………….#!$#U$(#!$I(#!$!$*@
I have to hold myself together and remind him that I don’t appreciate him asking 10 times. That I need silence to think about it, or silence to talk to daddy about it. He understands and holds his peace..
Elijah got a balance bike for his 4th birthday. Instead of the Thomas tricycle that he gravitates towards at BAbies R us… he loves that Thomas tricycle even though his knees are almost touching the handlebars and the rotation of the pedals are so tiny with his long legs- he’s like the Russian bear on a tricycle in Madagascar 3. He is just so impressive on that balance bike. On day one he was already putting his feet up and gliding on little hills. Now he runs and glides with it, as fast as on a regular bike. He astounds me. At first I thought we got him that bike too late for his age but I think its’ perfect. He enjoys it so much. I also love the story behind how the owner of STrider Bikes created it for the toddler. The first running bike was created in the early 1800’s but was for an adult (male most likely).

Back to Josie… she is SOOO CUTE. Her weight, her chubs, and her smiles, her affection. Her animated love of cute puppies and kittens. How her first words when she wakes up are things she wants to eat! Like this morning waking her up to take Elijah to preschool and she opened her eyes and said, “I cream? I cream” I’m going to miss it all!!!! And I’m going to work on capturing it all in the next few days/weeks/months/years!!! She is forming words and sentences, like yesterday I took her out to bike ride with Elijah and grabbed ELijah’s 3 year old poofy jacket and she couldn’t get her hands out of the long sleeves and declared, “TOO BIG!” I was so surprised. She also notices missing things and says, “Where is it?” Her funny words like, “Ah-Toy-ee” = smoothie, and “EEE” =brushing teeth and “AKEEE”= outside…. my Josie. Shin made up a melody with her name that goes, “Josie, Josie, Josie-Josie-Josie, Josie, Josieee” and she input “Mommy” in there and sings it to me. Ahhhh my precious Josie!!!!! I can’t help squealing over Josie. She is my darling….


Filed under: 365 photo blog — Annie at 11:03 pm on Friday, January 6, 2012

Josie Bath Time
Mama Cookin


Filed under: 365 photo blog — Annie at 12:40 am on Friday, January 6, 2012

Potty Time
Classical Hour
Evening Costco Run
Goodnight Moon


Potty Time

Classical Hour

Evening Costco Run

Goodnight Moon

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